More Babies Prefer Home Birth

I posted back in oct 2009 about my previous 2 homebirths right after I found this website. Now I want to add my third homebirth story.

http://morebabiespreferhomebirth.com/post/221323105/home-birth-story-two-home-births

My Third Homebirth

This story begins with a surprise, a disappointment and devastation, then a renewed joy. We had felt that our family of 4 was complete and were not trying for another child when we were pleasantly surprised. 
Surprise
The day that I had tested positive on that little home pregnancy test, I thought that I’d break the news to the family at dinner that night. I invited my dad over and made a nice dinner and even had placed an open Corona in front my husband at the table (something that I have never done by the way, so he was a bit suspicious and reluctant to touch it). Well, dinner barely started and I couldn’t contain myself with the news. Everyone was excited and a lively discussion ensued at the dinner table and finally my husband drank the beer.
Disappointment and Devastation
Since I wasn’t planning another pregnancy I didn’t have a clue what date was my last period so we went for an ultrasound. It showed that we were very early and the tech couldn’t accurately date it yet. It was a bit disappointing but still ok. Then about 4 weeks later, I started spotting blood. I called my midwife and we discussed a plan. A few days later, I had a miscarriage. The ER experience was horrible. I was devastated. I knew that I didn’t want to go through that again but I was not sure what I wanted. 
Renewed Joy
After a couple of months, out of the blue, I told my husband that I wanted another child. At first, he thought that I was joking, but when he saw in my eyes how serious I was, he was overjoyed. A couple of months later, we got that big fat positive home pregnancy test.
Pregnancy
It was a pretty normal pregnancy so I won’t dwell on it too much. I met with my midwife that had for our second child and she was just as awesome as before. We did however have a slight moment of uncertainty in the beginning. Our midwife was not able to hear the fetal heartbeat on the first visit. She knew how insecure I was since having gone through the miscarriage and kindly told me that I could just drop by anytime after the 14th week, no appointment necessary, and she would take another listen. Well, I got a bit busy and didn’t come back until week 15. She checked again and still could only pick up my pulse on the Doppler. So she quickly ordered the ultrasound at the local hospital and arranged an appointment as soon as they would get me in, which was 2 days later. Those were agonizing 2 days. The ultrasound went well and we saw the heartbeat and baby moving around. It was such a relief that I could not hold back the tears. My nearly 6 year old son wanted to know w! hy I was crying and I told him it was for happiness and that sometimes moms do that and it’s ok. The rest of the pregnancy, I didn’t want to know the gender so it was exciting as time got closer to the end.
Due Date
My other 2 were born rather close to my due dates so I naturally expected that this one would also. It was rather amusing listening to all of the complete strangers and friends and family that I would run into that had all kinds of predictions on gender and when I’d give birth. All of them were wrong. I did however expect to have back labor this time, since I had it with both of my other 2 and during the miscarriage. That prediction was correct. 
The Next Day
The day after my due date, at about 3am, I started to have contractions, in my lower back. They were quite painful right from the start so I naturally assumed that baby would be here soon, perhaps later that day. I made some calls to the midwife, my sister and my mother and then tried to go back to sleep to get some rest knowing that this was going to be a long day.
I was relieved to know that despite the back pain, I was able to get some sleep. I laid on a heating pad and let my husband sleep after I let him know what was going on. I knew that I would need his help later. All through the day, the contractions were quite sporadic. I tried timing them several times and each time I was disappointed when they were not consistent or getting stronger or longer. They did reach a point when I needed my husband to massage my lower back to get through each one. So all day long, he helped me get through them and we tried to have a semi-normal day. 
As evening approached, I had the feeling that things were going to pick up so I called my friend that was going to watch the kids. I timed the contractions for an hour and still no pattern. We watched a movie for a distraction. When the contractions still had not changed, the midwife called for an update, she recommended rest and suspected that things would pick up later that night. So, I sent the kids to bed and our friend home for some rest and she promised to return when we needed her.
I decided to lay down in bed in kind of a lunge-like position, half on my left-side, half on my belly with my right knee up as close to my chest as my belly allowed possible. I labored through a few contractions when suddenly, I had an uncontrollable persistent pain and had my husband come in and help me up out of bed. I went to the bathroom and then to the living room to sit on the exercise ball. Since my husband was at the computer I sat near him so that he could massage my lower back through the contractions. It didn’t take long and they were coming one right after another. He barely had time to make the 3 phone calls in between my contractions to get our friend, my sister (the doula) and my midwife to come.
Our friend was closest, so she got here first. I never bothered to time these contractions because they were so strong and fast and long that all I could do was rock on the ball and lean onto a chair in front of me with my husband behind me massaging. Then, I felt a small gush of water and the membrane moving down the canal. I stood up bent over and screamed, “The baby is coming now!” I asked my husband to help me get my pants off, but they were stuck. After he tried a bit to get them off, to no avail, I told him to just cut them off. He did and then went back to massaging me. I went to my knees and leaned on the computer chair. Our friend called the midwife to update her on this new development and she said that she was only 5 minutes away. I knew that I had to start pushing and prayed that the midwife would get here in time.
The midwife, her assistant and my sister all arrived at the same time and they quickly worked together to get the birthing supplies together and ready. My sister then took over the massage with counter-pressure right where and when I needed it most. That almost took the pain away, well, at least the back pain anyway. The baby’s head was quite large so it took a few contractions to get it out and when it hit the half-way point, the contractions paused long enough to allow the perineum to stretch naturally. Once the head was all the way out, just one more big push and the whole body came out. Not a single tear. Only 27 minutes of pushing out of 1 hour and 17 minutes or active labor. Our big baby was lying behind me while the midwife suctioned out his lungs so I couldn’t see what we had until I asked. My husband said, “It’s a boy.” I could tell that he was big but it wasn’t until we were settled in bed and the midwife weighed him that we got the shock. He was 10 pou! nds and 4 ounces, 22 inches long and head circumference of 35cm. Somehow I knew that he was going to be that big. At some point near the end, I don’t recall exactly, I gave our friend the OK to wake up our son to be a part of things and we let our daughter sleep until baby and I were in bed. 
The kids were quite excited and had lots of fun taking pictures of the baby and everyone there. They almost didn’t want to go back to bed.
Out of all 3 labors, this one was by far the hardest and the easiest. I know that doesn’t make much sense, but I feel wonderful and grateful and blessed to have had the support and love and the strength to carry out this one life-altering event in the safety and security of my home. This story is just the third installment of my homebirth journey that began several years ago. I cherish every moment of it and the family that we have become.

{If you’d like to share your own home birth story, please use the form at right to submit it.}

God ALWAYS Answers Prayers!

As a woman enters a pregnancy, she starts down a path that will present her with many opportunities for learning and personal growth. Miriam’s birth was no exception to this. As this was my fourth pregnancy, I wasn’t new to this journey and was eager to see where this one would take me.

The first decision we made in regard to this pregnancy was to give birth at home without a midwife or doctor in attendance. In the “birth world” this is referred to as an unassisted birth. Most people you visit with will find this idea extremely dangerous, but there is a small group of people who see the value to this way and of course there are some who even think it’s the only way to give birth. After our journey through this pregnancy and birth, I can honestly say I actually fit in the middle of the road on this issue.

Our prior births were wonderful! Each was vaginal, natural births. The first was at a hospital with one of the midwives on call. Our second and third births were at home with a midwife. Each experience was life changing. As we prepared for our fourth birth, it was time to evaluate how we wanted to do it. After much soul searching and prayer, we came to the conclusion that it was time to do it on our own. By choosing to give birth unassisted, we knew that many people would not understand and ever sadder yet, wouldn’t want to try to understand. Because of this, we kept our decision quiet.

Thankfully this pregnancy was a normal one because the mental battles it provided were enough. At the end of pregnancy, I found myself quite swollen due to poor nutritional choices earlier. While I was uncomfortable because of this, I learned much about how the body reacts to the foods I eat. Each discomfort provides an opportunity to learn and to grow!

Around the eighth month, I decided to write my baby’s birth story as if it had already happened. It was a fun project to do and I found myself really sinking into the story and believing it. But then I set the story aside and forgot about it. As the weeks rolled by, normal mom fears about birth started to sink in. The problem with this for me was that I teach childbirth education, I am a doula, I am a student midwife, I basically preach a trust birth message to all I meet because I feel so deeply that birth is safe. Fueling these deep feelings that birth is safe, is a deep faith in my Creator. He created me, He created birth, He didn’t make any mistakes. What you put your energy into, you will create. If you put it into worry and fear, you can create the very thing you are worried and fearful of. I did not want to be in this state. I did not want to allow those worries and fears to drive me. It’s ok to have some fear and worry, it motivates you to learn more, to be better, to grow, but you can not allow yourself to “live” in that state.

I reached a point in my fear where I could no longer see the birth past the labor. I could not imagine a baby at the end. If I dared to picture the baby, I could not picture the baby breathing. It was a terrible place to be. And yet, in spite of being in such a crummy place, I recognized that I had a huge opportunity for growth here. I knew that this birth was going to be amazing and I knew that it would prepare me for my next big adventure in the birth world. Because of this, I needed to tackle these fears and I needed to exert dominion over the enemy who was trying to control me. I was in the car one day; near the end of the pregnancy, really feeling overwhelmed and knew it was time to put an end to it. I told myself, “I TRUST BIRTH AND I TRUST BIRTH’S CREATOR!” Mind you, I didn’t just think it; I chanted it out loud in the car as I drove, over and over and over again. With tears streaming down my face I started to believe once more in my body and in birth. That night at home in my office, I pulled out the birth story I had written about 4 weeks prior and read it again. There it was! My baby was born! My baby took a breath! My baby was healthy! By reading my story again, I was able to once again see beyond my fears and my worries! I was able to believe in myself, my body, my baby! I found out later that several friends, who had already committed to pray for me and my baby, had been prompted that same evening to pray even more for me. God knew I needed a little extra boost that night to get over the hump of my battle.

The thing is, as I was walking through this battlefield of doubts, worry and fear, I knew deep within me, that this was a good thing. That if I did it right, I would come out on the other end stronger and more prepared. Knowing this didn’t necessarily make the journey an easy one, but maybe a tad easier to understand. While I was going through this, unknown to me, my husband was battling with some doubts and fears himself. He is a man of great faith and trust in the human body. While he was fighting this, God spoke to him and told him it wasn’t his battle to go through, it was mine. I was the one who needed to go through this. God’s plans are so great and so much bigger than any of us can envision and He knew I needed this opportunity.

After I conquered my fears that night, the last two weeks of my pregnancy went by relatively well. I was tired, I was swollen, I was ornery, I was ready for my baby, but these are normal end of pregnancy discomforts. The battle I had to fight had been conquered. I was ready for the labor and birth to begin!

For several years I had been reading about pain free birth. It is completely possible for a woman to have a pain free birth. Naturally, I wanted one! The problem with pain free births is that in our society, we literally grow in the womb of a woman who doesn’t believe or even know of a pain free birth. From that moment until the moment we give birth, we are surrounded with the belief that birth is painful. Because of that deep belief, it generally is painful. Some women are able to break that pattern of belief and achieve the pain free birth that I was praying for. In other societies, pain free birth is the norm and it is from them, that women have begun to dream of this possibility.

Two days after my due date, on a Friday, I left by myself to run some errands. I returned home at 5pm and went to use the bathroom. As I was finishing up, the thought ran through my head, “I wonder when I’m going to lose my plug”. With the previous births, I had lost my plug just prior to going into labor and so for me, this is a sign of labor approaching soon. As I stood from the toilet, I felt something release and a gush of fluid! How ironic the timing of that thought followed by that release! When I looked at the “goop”, however, it looked yellowy-green. I had always read that green fluid is a sign of meconium and is not a good thing. While this wasn’t dark like the green I had envisioned, it made me concerned. I showed Jon and we talked about it. I had prayed very hard that if a reason arose for the need to go to the hospital, that God would really hit me over the head with it, because it was going to take a big thing to get me to leave my home. I know that if we went in because of this, it would lead to an induction which leads to a lot more pain which can frequently lead to a cesarean which can lead to NICU for baby…simply a road I wanted to avoid. I started to believe that this was simply another test for me. In the end, I was correct, it was nothing more than the mucous and when baby came out there was no sign of meconium at all.

Within thirty minutes of the water rupturing, the contractions began. Nothing wild and crazy, nothing overly demanding, but they were there and they were consistent. While we did not intend on having a midwife at the birth, we did have two friends committed to helping us. One was here to help with the boys and all the other little miscellaneous things that crop up at a birth and the other to video the birth for us. The first one had an hour drive, so it was hard to know when was the right time to call these ladies to come. Each of my births have gone faster, the last being only 5 hours, so I didn’t want to stall too long in calling them.

By nine in the evening, 4 hours after the water ruptured, both friends were here, everyone waiting upon my body and the baby’s to get to work! But nothing really happened and at ten the kids went to bed and Jon and I laid down in the living room to take a nap. The friends were supposed to rest, too, but they had more difficulty! Jon spent the time praying, I dozed in and out trying not to dwell on things I have little control over. During the next two hours, the contractions slowed down even more and even felt like they had stopped. I found myself wondering if I was really in labor or if I had made a mistake.

Two hours later, at midnight I awoke to use the bathroom. When I finished, I went into the toy room where one of the friends was waiting. She was simply doodling and waiting. She said she was too excited to sleep. This was the first birth she had even been to that didn’t include her own births. As we started to chat, the contractions started to come. This time they were stronger and sharper, lasting a full minute and returning about 3 minutes later. It was nice to know that I hadn’t been fooled by my body, that I was really in labor! Within a few minutes of joining the first friend, the other one somehow knew we were up and she joined us as well. By a quarter after midnight, Jon was up and sitting in our circle as well. We sat and chatted quietly, though I have no memory of what we were talking about. As a contraction came on, we were quiet as I worked with it and then conversation would return. It didn’t take long before I was moving around trying different positions to work through the contractions because they were getting more and more uncomfortable. I sat on the futon; on the futon with my feet raised; leaning forward, on my squatting chair; on the squatting chair leaning on the exercise ball; seated on the ball; kneeling on the floor, resting on the ball…yep…I tried everything I could think if. I finally came to the conclusion, nothing was comfortable and it wasn’t looking good for my pain free birth.

Around 2:30 in the morning, I decided I was ready to get into the pool. Jon had prepared it hours before and it was ready for me! It was actually still too warm and had to be cooled down, but I was able to slip into the warm comfort and get a short breather with the contractions. The transition into the water caused my body to skip a contraction, so instead of them being two to three minutes apart, I had a six minute break. That was nice! Our oldest son was brought down shortly after that. He was eight at the time and was very excited to be a part of the birth and was well prepared. He came down, sat quietly and took a few pictures for me. He’s a very caring boy and knew to be still for me. His presence, which was at the birth of his siblings, has always brought me peace in various ways. I held his hand through one contraction and squeezed it hard at one point…partly because I needed to, partly to show him the intensity of what I was feeling. At the end of the contraction, he looked at me with wide eyes and said, “You were really squeezing hard!”

I stayed in the pool for about 2 hours, until the baby was born. Like labor outside the pool, I had to try all the different positions, struggling to find the right one. Somewhere along the way, I asked Jon to get into the pool with me. He sat in front of me and as a contraction started in, we would grasp hands and I could squeeze his hand and sort of pull with it. It looked an awful lot like we were arm wrestling! But it worked well. There were two distinct moments where I recognized the baby was pushing from the inside. I could feel the little feet pushing off from the top of the fundus, helping with the birth! At 4am I asked that the other two brothers be woke up. Jon wasn’t sure it was the right time, but I could sense we were getting close and I needed to know everyone was where they were supposed to be. I didn’t want anyone to miss the moment.

Sometime after I got into the pool, I finally had to acknowledge that the pain free birth I had been praying so hard for wasn’t going to happen. I was mad! I had wanted that pain free birth so bad and here I was, going through the exact same labor I had with my last child. In my last labor, at one of the final contractions, I was literally biting my hand because the contraction was so strong! I didn’t want his labor all over again. Needless to say, I was pouting and unhappy. But then I realized, just like when I had to tackle my worries and fears prior to labor, I had to tackle my bad attitude about the labor. I remember one distinct break between contractions, when I chose to turn inward. My eyes were open and I was staring off into nothing. In my head, I was giving myself a very stern talking-to. I told myself “You need to stop moping about not getting a pain free birth. God is with you right now! He is holding you up and supporting you! You are not alone! This is the last baby you are going to have and this baby deserves a dignified birth, just like it’s brothers received! It’s time to grow up and stop whining!” The funny part is, from the outside, it look like things are going great, that I had a good handle on the situation. The reality was, I did not! But after that two minute “mind-lashing”, I was much better!

Leading up to pushing the baby out, I had been seated forward, facing Jon, in a position that would be convenient for catching the baby (I had done this the last time and wanted to repeat it with this birth). But at the last moment, I decided to turn around, and rest at the wall of the pool on my knees. I had never pushed on my knees before, this was new to me, but was right for this baby. I could feel it was time to bear down, hard! I could feel from deep within me that this baby will be here very soon! And I was right! The head crowned and while my brain kept saying, feel your baby’s head, I couldn’t get my hand to obey. Jon suggested that I reach down and feel the baby’s head and I am very grateful for that, because I was able to obey him. There was the sweetest, softest, little head at my fingertips. I had waited nine long months for this first touch of heaven! With barely a pause, I muttered to Jon, get ready to catch the rest. I knew the contraction wasn’t going to let up and that the baby was ready to burst out. I could feel the burning and wanted to push gently with it, but the baby was ready to be with us now! One friend thought I was pushing without a contraction and was worried I would tear. Jon wasn’t planning on catching so I when I said to get ready, his response was confused. Within moments, the head was out! I had a moment to catch my breath and then I was pushing the shoulders out. They seemed like more of an effort to release, but then they were out and the rest of the baby slithered out. Jon’s hands were there and without actually catching, he pushed the baby between my legs and I looked down to see my baby “swimming” towards me. I scooped the baby up and leaned back with my prize on my chest!

Within moments, the baby started to take its first little breaths and start crying. When I was confident baby was fine, I prepared to take a peak at the gender. While I envisioned a little penis, I discovered there was none! It was our first girl, Miriam Rose! She was perfect! The rest of the postpartum was just wonderful. Prayers being answered left and right! The placenta came with ease, but strong enough to let me know it was coming. We did the breast crawl with baby and allowed her to find the breast on her own. Nursing was successful! The big brothers were filled with joy! And Jon and I, we were stunned and elated over the beauty of this birth and its journey!

I prayed for a pain free birth. What I received was a fear free birth. It took me a few days to recognize this, but it’s true. God could have given me a pain free birth, but I don’t know what one looks like or feels like. I would have been lost. What He gave me was a birth I KNEW! I knew what was happening with this labor. I knew what would come next because I had already walked this labor before. Because of this, while there was pain, there was no fear. The greatest gift, beyond the baby of course, came after the birth. As I look back up the births of my second and third sons, I generally felt pain and an overwhelming sense of discomfort. We like to say that women forget the pain of birth after the birth and while some do completely, many of us hang on to parts of it. I certainly did with those two births. But I discover with this last one, within hours after the birth, I could look back upon the birth, the contractions, the pain, and feel nothing but joy. God took away the pain AFTER the birth! What a beautiful gift to receive!

About six weeks after Miriam’s birth, this verse was mentioned at church.
(James 1:2-4) Consider it a sheer gift, friends, when tests and challenges come at you from all sides. You know that under pressure, your faith-life is forced into the open and shows its true colors. So don’t try to get out of anything prematurely. Let it do its work so you become mature and well-developed, not deficient in any way.
I felt it best spoke of all I learned and gained through Miriam’s pregnancy and birth! It was well worth the mental battles that we walked through!

{If you’d like to share your own home birth story, please use the form at right to submit it.}

Our life’s journey begins in the womb. It is a time that should be respected and honored for its life impact. We each undergo this at least once, more if we’re parents through our children. We honor our children by accepting their journey through all its joys and challenges. By honoring their journey we honor ours.

My husband Jon is a chiropractor. I teach Bradley® childbirth classes and study midwifery. Together we have three wonderful sons! With all we know of the body and birth, we are humbled with each of our sons’ birth journeys. We recognize that there is something greater than ourselves and we lean on God as He asked in Proverbs 3:5.

This was my great lesson with our second child. When our first was only ten months old I found myself pregnant with child number two. We were so excited! I was actually eager to experience labor and apply my instructor training. We were also excited to experience our first homebirth.

Soon we were sharing our news with all we encountered! We found the midwife in our area and visited with her about homebirth and her role with us. As I taught weekly Bradley® classes, the words I shared with my students took on a stronger meaning. Our journey with Simon had begun!

The pregnancy progressed like all pregnancies do. Nap time was my favorite; our oldest and I took lazy naps and cuddled, savoring our last months of just being two. I think Stephen, though very young, had a sense of change. He may not have been able to tell me what was happening but I think a part of him knew it was something big.

After 40 weeks, my due date finally arrived…and then it passed, as due dates often do. Knowing that a due date is only an estimate and that only five percent of women actually birth then meant nothing to me. I was like all pregnant moms, uncomfortable and ready for labor. Little did I know I had three more weeks to go.

I cannot express the wait of the following weeks. Moms who have waited for labor to naturally begin may understand, yet few moms are allowed to wait as long as I was blessed to. Yes, I do mean blessed, though I didn’t realize it at the time. Wisdom often comes after the fact! Jon, Simon and I were to wait until hours shy of 43 weeks. Gasp! There are so many fears and misunderstandings about waiting this long, but it wasn’t my journey, it was Simon’s and I wasn’t the one in charge, God was. So we waited.

It wasn’t an easy wait. I was a lot more uncomfortable this time. I was tired. I thought I would never get to meet our child. The birthing pool was inflated then deflated several times as we waited. And my husband was bombarded with, “you have the baby yet?” literally every five minutes! We were ready…Simon was not.

Only about three percent of babies go past 42 weeks. Few are allowed to wait 42 weeks before either the attending or the mom demands an induction. Studies done in 1982, 1989 and 1996 have shown “no significant increase in neonatal mortality rates after 42 weeks and only a slight increase after 43 weeks.” The 1996 study even showed “no increase in complications compared to the births of babies born on-time, between 38 and 42 weeks.” (Wagner, 94-95)

So we waited. We had many prenatal visits and found the baby and fluid fine. I will admit that I tried nearly every “natural” way to induce labor, but Simon said, “Not yet.” Even the castor oil at the very end of 42 weeks had no effect. It was simply not time, though my cervix was dilated four centimeters and effacing rapidly. When things started it would be fast!

The day before 43 weeks, things finally began. I was in denial; I wasn’t capable of going into labor, this must be something else! After four hours of contractions increasing in intensity and duration, I was forced to conclude that it was time! By five o’clock everyone we needed had arrived.

The labor itself was really simple. I spent some time laboring on our sofa watching a movie and playing computer games, stopping only for contractions. When that got to be too much, I moved to bed and laid there, eyes closed during contractions and visiting quietly between. Finally I was ready for the pool. Ah, sweet relief. Once in the pool I found a new sense of comfort. My energy was renewed. It’s like getting an extra life in a video game!

We labored in the pool, joking and having “fun.” Transition hit about 30-45 minutes before Simon was born. I remember thinking “this is so intense!” Naturally I didn’t recognize transition at the time! Jon was sitting in front of me ready to catch, midwife over his shoulder to guide and keep an eye on things. At 8:04pm Simon reached a full crown. The midwife told me to feel his head but I couldn’t, I felt unable to let go of Jon’s hands. Mind you, his hands were ready to “catch,” mine were behind me, supporting myself. Wow, amazing how much support my husband offered me simply through his presence!

Almost three minutes after crowning, Simon’s head came out, with only a moment’s pause when the rest of him shot out into daddy’s hands. Almost immediately he was in my stunned arms. Here was the child I was convinced I would never meet. His birth journey wasted no time. He lives his life the way he approached his birth; difficult to start, but when he does, get out of his way, he acts fast!

He was born covered in meconium; though it wasn’t fresh, as if he passed it many days earlier. I often wonder about the castor oil I took a week prior. Experts say it doesn’t affect the baby, yet I wonder. And in spite of the meconium, he was alert and vigorous. At an even 9 pounds 21 inches, he was perfect! The due date was concluded as accurate.

What an amazing journey that I am pleased we honored and traveled together. I look forward to the days ahead when I will be witness to the journey of other babies and their families.

*Wagner, Marsden. Born in the USA. University of California, 2006.

{If you’d like to share your own home birth story, please use the form at right to submit it.}

The day leading up to Micah’s birth was like many others, except it wasn’t, it was almost his birth day! We had a prenatal appointment that afternoon and had to have the conversation about what would happen if I were to go past 42 weeks. This is something each client covers at this point, but our history with Simon’s 43 week pregnancy made it even more relevant. I had stated frequently throughout the earlier prenatals that I was not going to do anything about it if I go late. No castor oil and more importantly no panicking. Everything was looking great. I allowed a vaginal exam to see if I was making any progress and was pleased to know that I was 3cm dilated and 50-60% effaced and the head was engaged.

After the appointment, I grabbed my headphones and went for a walk. The music was exactly what I needed to hear and it really lifted me up and filled me with renewed joy. The walk was quite short but I definitely was feeling contractions off and on and when I tried to explain them, I found they felt “real”.

We had dinner, a nice venison stew/soup that Jon made, hung out with the boys for a little bit and then they went to bed. Jon told them they needed to get their rest because mom was going to have a baby soon and they might have to wake up in the middle of the night. He seemed so confident that I was going into labor that night. Jon and I sat down to watch a movie, The Transporter and I hooked up to the breast pump to try and get things to start. After about 20 minutes it was quite clear I did not need the pump to maintain the contractions so I turned it off and let them run their course.

The movie ended and I was tired but was afraid if I went to bed the contractions would stop…hum…if they did, then I really wasn’t in labor, if it’s real labor, they weren’t about to stop. Silly me! Anyway, we got a second movie ready and debated setting up the birth supplies and readying the house for a birth. It seemed a bit early, so I suggested we wait.

Before we started the movie, however, a bathroom break was needed and I was surprised with the passing of the mucus plug. Yea! More progress. I also found that the more I moved, the stronger the contractions got. I decided it wouldn’t hurt to bring down the supplies. By the time I brought down some of the things, it seemed a safe to bet to get everything ready. It was about 10:30 and we were debating calling the others who would be at the birth. I hated to call them if it was a false alarm and yet both of the friends joining us were moms who needed to make arrangements for their children and one friend had an hour and a half drive.

A few contractions later, I decided it was safe to call them. I couldn’t believe how fast things were progressing. Nothing was painful or hurting, just really strong. As each contraction hit, I would have to stop what I was doing, put my head down and just relax wherever I was at the moment.

Jon was simply dancing with excitement. It was so fun to watch him. He had taken the whole week off of work due to the fact that the Fourth of July was on a Wed and it seemed a good time for a break. I had hoped to give birth late the previous week so he would have the whole week with the new baby. I always envisioned calling him home from work due to labor, but not this time. I am glad God waited until he could be there to witness the whole process start.

I called my friend the furthest away first. Her response was so cute, “I’m going to cry I’m so excited!” That was the exact excitement I was looking for with this birth! The second friend was called and finally the midwife. The midwife lived close to us, so I simply let her know that when things got closer we would call her. In the meantime she could rest up!

By midnight both friends were here, the home was set and ready for a birth and we were all giddy with excitement! We tried to watch a movie but that wasn’t working so we just labored patiently. At 1:20am, while I was sitting on the couch noticing that the contractions were getting stronger, the water broke. What a surprise that was! With the previous births it happened in the pools and I never noticed. This was quite obvious. The funny thing was, I found myself wearing both my laboring mom’s hat and my midwifery student’s hat and noting that I will need to check the fluid to make sure it was clear! As the thought went through my head I chuckled at the absurdity of it. It was clear, by the way =)

We called the midwife then and moved into the pool for a bit of relief. The midwife was there shortly and we woke up Stephen and Simon. The birth party was complete, save for the baby! The midwife had me get out of the pool for about 45 minutes or so and then I returned. There was no way I could stay out of it any longer!

The contractions were very intense by this point and it took every bit of effort to stay relaxed through them. It’s curious that in between them, I was still able to maintain some normalcy with everyone. I still smiled at the boys and tried to crack a few jokes. It may have been because of them that I did that so they wouldn’t get scared. I needn’t have worried; they thought it was great fun! I don’t think my friends realized how close I was. The midwife wasn’t fooled, though and I got excited when I saw her washing up and getting her gloves on!

My goal was to catch this baby and I had made this Jon’s number one job to help me with. I also wanted to reach down and feel the baby’s head to assess how close I was. We were getting very close to the birth, the contractions were very hard and Jon told me to get off of my hands and knees so I could reach down and see if I could feel anything and prepare for the catch. I tried to tell him I couldn’t, but thankfully he didn’t let me get away with that.

I felt nothing and I have to admit I was a little disappointed. There was no need to be, though. With the next contraction, the head descended the last little bit. I have never felt anything so intense. Apparently I was biting the back of my hand during this, though I have no recollection of this. I do remember biting onto the handle on the pool and thinking that I was really acting like an animal and was kind of embarrassed, but at the same time found much pleasure in it. I noticed the teeth marks on the top of my hand after the birth! At the end of that contraction, the head was in a full crown! WOW! That was fast! After a brief break, I pushed the head out, the whole time I had my hand down there feeling and stroking my child’s head! I tried to give a little push to see if I could get the rest of the baby out, but my uterus said “no way! I need a short break before we finish this off!” So with the next contraction, he slowly came out. I remember having to give him a! good push to move him, while muttering “out, out, out” but then he was out and I was pulling him back to me in the water with my right hand, trying to get my left hand to participate in the catch as well. And then there he was! My beautiful child in my arms! 3:26am on the fourth of July roughly 5 hours after it all started.

The big brothers were so excited! Stephen was right up front with probably the best seat in the house! Simon simply circled the pool trying to see the baby from all sides. And the baby, a boy, had his eyes open, looking around, taking us all in. Gently starting to breathe and let out with little tiny cries as he said hello. A week later, Stephen said to me, “birth was cool, mom! We should do that again!”

Micah Jon weighed in at ten pounds four ounces and 22 inches long surprising us all. He has been an amazing little baby and is surrounded with love!

{If you’d like to share your own home birth story, please use the form at right to submit it.}

To know how tremendous this experience was I have to share my varied birthing history. My first was a c-section after a very long labor, it traumatized me, at one point I had to beg for a nurse to remove her hands from my vagina. It took me a while to heal, but I found a way through. My second was a planned homebirth, expecting to be more like a first timer, and thus a long labor the pain and intensity of the contractions scared me into a non-emergent transfer. He was born 17 minutes after our arrival at the hospital. I now lovingly refer to it as the comical train wreck. When we found we were expecting again in July 2009 I had no doubt we’d be having a homebirth.

The day of my first due date I was urged by my midwife to enjoy my husband and do some walking. It was March and to my luck the weather was gorgeous. I however was miserable, I had even shared my thoughts of “pregnancy you’ve won, you own my soul!” A final surrender of sorts. My husband took my 2 older sons out of the house the day after my first due date and allowed me to rest, be miserable, wallow, cry, whatever felt good and I took full advantage. I enjoyed ice cream, and pineapple, a chick flick, a hot shower and a nap. When he returned it was time to make dinner, we planned a family indoor picnic complete with a movie. Afterwards we were going to take advantage of the lovely weather while my mom was kept an eye on the big boys.



We left a little after 6pm, my husband lost the bet of when I’d go into labor which we joked about during our long walk. I did some curb walking during our outing knowing it’s supposed to improve fetal positioning, I had a feeling my little one’s head wasn’t well flexed like it should be. With one foot in the gutter, and the other foot on the curb I walked for half a block then alternated and put the opposite foot in the gutter and on the curb. It really got the baby to descend and I had to squat, wiggle and waddle to accommodate the now lower baby in my pelvis. Then I had a contraction, not abnormal at this point in pregnancy, but this was a little different because I had to hold on to my husband and sway my hips. We had some distance to go to get home so we continued to enjoy our conversation and the warm air. A few blocks later another contraction that I had to stop and hold onto my husband again through. I was not getting my hopes up for anything other than some improved fetal positioning and some freebie centimeters before the real show. We were about 4 blocks from home when my mom called us, my 2 year old wanted to know where we were. As soon as I saw my 2 year old, he jumped into my arms, I let go of the thought of labor and the contractions seemed to stop. My sweet “baby” boy was a welcomed distraction.

The thing about 2 year olds is once they know where you are they will happily run off to do something else, and so he did. I decided to sit down at the computer and check on my other expecting March mamas. After a while noticed I was having these beautiful sensations, they felt so good I was afraid to move and make them stop. I could feel my uterus pull up on the lower uterine segment, when it would come to a peak my upper uterine segment would press down, peak, then both sensations faded together. It was such a glorious sensual sensation. Rhythmic, ecstatic. I thought, maybe these are contractions so I searched for a contraction timer. And timed my sensations They we coming every 2-5 minutes lasting 10seconds to 1 minute. I watched this for almost an hour before the energy of the sensations required my attention. I expanded the screen to show my husband but he didn’t quite get it. “Contractions” I said, he now knew we needed to get to work. I decided we should blow up the tub and prep the bed, just in case it was labor. I told my husband if I was still contracting after we finished getting our room prepped I would call the midwife and let her know something was happening, or possibly nothing. At 8:30, after an hour and half of contractions, we were done with the room and I made the call. We both agreed a shower would be good for getting rest but I couldn’t stop moving and felt like I had to do a million things, so I did them. We finally laid down around 10pm to unwind. We watched some TV and cuddled our cosleeping 2 year old, at 10:30 we turned the lights out. From 10 to 10:30 I had no sensations so I really relaxed and was ready to drift off to sleep and greet the next morning still pregnant.

Within minutes of drifting off I sat up and said “nope I can’t lay down” and tried to get in the shower, as my midwife had suggested earlier but I also told my husband to call the midwife. A wave of nausea hit, follow by trembling that I couldn’t control. I got in the shower but it felt all wrong, I needed to be submerged. As I went to step out I released some pink fluid, my water broke(or so I thought). My husband handed me the phone, the midwife was letting me know she was in her car and on her way. I couldn’t focus so I gave the phone back to my husband. I needed the tub filled so I called my mom down to do that for me. In a blur I got my robe on, my birthing necklace on (beads sent from my fellow March mamas), got candles put up, had my husband light them, got my birth ball, and got to work. Every few minutes, or seconds it felt like, I had to get on my hands and knees and rock against the ball. The sensations were so much bigger than me I had to let them out. Tears of joy would pour from me, I couldn’t stop smiling with every wave and I couldn’t stop myself from saying “Yes baby!” “I love you baby!” “Oooopen.” The bigger the sensations got the louder my mantra got, the bigger my smile got. I felt so right, so good. The room was suddenly empty but I couldn’t resist the pool any longer and I got in. I felt so sensual and feminine.

Finally my husband came back, I asked him get the camera so he could take pictures, he made me smile for a picture. Around this time I realized that our clock was 15 minutes fast and asked my husband to change it to the right time since we’d need it for the time. It was 11pm. My hair was still mostly wet from the shower and sticking in my face. I requested a hair tie but as soon as I got my hair put up I tried to sit down and another contractions, a different kind of contraction forced me out of the reclining position I was in back onto hands and knees leaning on the birth tub’s edge and oh my goodness I had to poop! I immediately told my husband “I need to poop, call the midwife.” He asked if I needed permission to poop, I smiled to myself at his silly question but just said “yes” because I knew it wasn’t a bowel movement, it was the urge to push. All the trembling and nausea had been transition.

He got the midwife on the phone. One of the fears we had discussed was pushing and waiting until I had to push. After the first sensation with the urge, the next sensation I said “no,no,no” to and immediately I was in pain. I realized that I wouldn’t be able to not push, this was the first and last time the whole labor when anything hurt. With the next sensation I didn’t fight and the pain was gone. My husband still on the phone was being reminded to remind me to breathe just keep breathing, slowly and deeply. This is exactly what I needed. I couldn’t help myself I had to bear down. It was a bit of a test push, because if it hurt I wasn’t going to push! I’d rather stay pregnant forever. To my surprise and delight, and with a little clitoral stimulation, it didn’t hurt. My husband tried to give me the phone but I was busy, I was birthing. I reached down to feel and the bag of water was coming down. I could feel baby’s hairy head inside the bag of water. I bared down again, my hands eager and ready to touch my baby. I kept feeling, I could feel where the outer bag had broken but the inner bag was intact. I bared down again, time for the big stretch, I expected the ring of fire but once again the sensation surprised me with good feelings instead. His head was born still in the bag of water. Without thought I stuck my fingers in the bag right below his chin and gently tore it away from baby’s head. I could feel a head full of thick hair. The last contraction to bring baby earth side came, still without pain, and I asked someone to catch the baby, but no one knew how fast things had happened or that I had been pushing at all. I grunted and bared down for the 4th time and he was out, I lifted my leg over him and sat to grab my baby. He was gorgeous and COVERED in vernix, it was creamy and soft, and he was so warm and wet. I was in love, I could not believe that I had just birthed my baby with only his family present. He arrived 8 minutes after my husband changed the time on the clock, with only 4 pushes. He opened his big eyes to look at me then started to breathe.



He turned a beautiful shade of pink. I wrapped him in a towel, our midwife which was still on the phone with my husband, suggested I get onto a chux pad for the placenta. I thought this idea was brilliant, the tub wasn’t full enough for my liking and was fast becoming chilled. A little wobbly I got out and walked the 2 feet or so to my bed where my husband had laid a chux pad on the bed. I sat down and mentally told myself “it’s time to let go[of the placenta]” I felt a contraction again and felt the placenta slide down, so I gave a little push and the placenta came out half way. I knew the placenta had detached so I felt comfortable assisting it out the rest of the way. So I picked it up and plopped it in a bowl, it was huge and gorgeous as I imagined it to be. Shortly after I birthed the placenta the assisting midwife arrived. She hugged us and told us how fantastic we all were, everything was just so perfect and calm she jumped into the clean up. Our midwife arrived not too long after. I was quickly examined for tears per my request, and nothing not even a skid mark, a perfectly intact perineum. I felt so relieved. Everyone was busy while baby and I cuddled, which I appreciated. I was given drinks and food to refuel though I wasn’t hungry. After a while we were ready to cut the cord, for the first time my husband got to cut the cord. This felt like the right time to allow daddy his first moments with his new son. My midwife and I did the post partum bathroom trip which was smooth sailing. I came back to the room and got my pajamas on, climbed into bed and was ready to do the newborn exam. I got to be the one to “examine” his palette, we measured his head which was smaller than I expected, were awed by all his hair, giggled at his length which was the same as his older brothers, then finally got to weigh him and diaper him. My sweet midwives made me a placenta smoothie and sang us a beautiful birthing day song and said goodbye 3 hours after the birth. It was my perfect birth!

{If you’d like to share your own home birth story, please use the form at right to submit it.}